1.31.2004
"We were going to win...until Jesus made me fumble the ball"
1.30.2004
"We're going to dance now. Please take it up a notch."
Thanks for checking in, homeslice!
My Thursday Night Observation: When the place you're DJing at isn't officially a dance club, you're not obligated to cater to their every whim, right? How about if they come back to the booth and tell you all stern-like that they're ready for you to start entertaining them? I didn't think so, but I just wanted to make sure.
This week's version of the Lord Finesse Exception (see below): I declare that requesters can be as formal as they wanna be if if they are so eager to cut a rug they don't even wait for us to mix into something obvious and start dirrrty-dancing to Mobb Deep instead. Gully, but a little weird.
(The other exception is if they say, "You know, a little Anita would definitely set this party off right.")
I went into Boston the other night and I can't wait for beisbol season to resume. Fenway may be buried in snow and ice, but somewhere within those walls, Nomar Garciaparra is getting even more swoll than ever. Dude's going to have no neck by Opening Day. Somewhere else, Manny Ramirez is starting for Game Eight to start.
My Thursday Night Observation: When the place you're DJing at isn't officially a dance club, you're not obligated to cater to their every whim, right? How about if they come back to the booth and tell you all stern-like that they're ready for you to start entertaining them? I didn't think so, but I just wanted to make sure.
This week's version of the Lord Finesse Exception (see below): I declare that requesters can be as formal as they wanna be if if they are so eager to cut a rug they don't even wait for us to mix into something obvious and start dirrrty-dancing to Mobb Deep instead. Gully, but a little weird.
(The other exception is if they say, "You know, a little Anita would definitely set this party off right.")
I went into Boston the other night and I can't wait for beisbol season to resume. Fenway may be buried in snow and ice, but somewhere within those walls, Nomar Garciaparra is getting even more swoll than ever. Dude's going to have no neck by Opening Day. Somewhere else, Manny Ramirez is starting for Game Eight to start.
Labels: ACTUAL CONVERSATIONS
1.29.2004
On the Real
A reader pointed out that I never finished the Kanye thought down below. I will soon. The short version: College Dropout is a beautiful mess of self-conflict up and down (not exactly virgin soil in hip-hop-land) and Kanye, fudging between Benz and backpack, is what he is--a hot producer with a bumpy flow. I've listened to Kanye's 'All Falls Down' ('Self Conscious' to all the bootleg heads) probably fifty times and the lyrics here (like much of the rest of the album) still astound me:
“I say Fuck the Police, that’s how I treat ‘em/We buy our way out of jail but we can’t buy freedom/We buy a lot of clothes but don’t really need ‘em/Things we buy to cover up what’s inside/Cause they made us hate ourselves and love they wealth/That’s why shorty hollerin’ ‘Where the ballers at?/Drug dealer buy Jordans/Crackhead buy crack/And the white man get paid off all of that
But I ain’t even gonna act holier than thou/Cause fuck it, I went to Jacob’s with twenty-five thou/Before I had a house and I’d do it again/Cause I want to be on 106 and Park pushing a Benz/I want to act ballerific like it’s all terrific/I got a couple past-due bills, I won’t get specific/I got a problem with spending before I get it/We all self-conscious, I’m just the first to admit it.”
“I say Fuck the Police, that’s how I treat ‘em/We buy our way out of jail but we can’t buy freedom/We buy a lot of clothes but don’t really need ‘em/Things we buy to cover up what’s inside/Cause they made us hate ourselves and love they wealth/That’s why shorty hollerin’ ‘Where the ballers at?/Drug dealer buy Jordans/Crackhead buy crack/And the white man get paid off all of that
But I ain’t even gonna act holier than thou/Cause fuck it, I went to Jacob’s with twenty-five thou/Before I had a house and I’d do it again/Cause I want to be on 106 and Park pushing a Benz/I want to act ballerific like it’s all terrific/I got a couple past-due bills, I won’t get specific/I got a problem with spending before I get it/We all self-conscious, I’m just the first to admit it.”
put your hands where my eyes can see, and stay away from the kids
R. Kelly has been granted permission to go to the Grammys, but only if he promises to have no contact with Michael Jackson. One might wonder what harm it would do--will the world, like, implode if they shake hands? are they planning a total jailbreak from sanity?
"Woop, woop, that's the sound when you weep"
The unimpeachable Douglas Wolk points out that there's a stab-like thing at the beginning of "My 1st Song" that Oliver and I missed. D refers to it as a "blat," which is fine by me, and points to "Back in the U.S.S.R." (or maybe "Savoy Truffle").
KRS-One was, like, fucking awesome tonight. The Teacha lost me somewhere around 'Sneak Attack' and it had been a while since I foisted the backpack and waved the ol' hands like I just didn't care. But tonight his gravitas was totally cynic-proof, his new shit sounded great and I found myself wondering about this whole Temple of Hip-Hop Kulture thing. In the right context--live, loud and even in a city like Boston--KRS makes perfect sense, from the bombast and I-am-Hip-Hop arrogance to his tenacious-to-the-point-of-religious refusal to let go of the past.
Yep, longevity in hip-hop is a bitch. I had better stop before I start getting weepy about all the could-have-beens and should-still-beez that make this cold heart turn warm.
5:33 AM is a good time to be tired of being a critic.
KRS-One was, like, fucking awesome tonight. The Teacha lost me somewhere around 'Sneak Attack' and it had been a while since I foisted the backpack and waved the ol' hands like I just didn't care. But tonight his gravitas was totally cynic-proof, his new shit sounded great and I found myself wondering about this whole Temple of Hip-Hop Kulture thing. In the right context--live, loud and even in a city like Boston--KRS makes perfect sense, from the bombast and I-am-Hip-Hop arrogance to his tenacious-to-the-point-of-religious refusal to let go of the past.
Yep, longevity in hip-hop is a bitch. I had better stop before I start getting weepy about all the could-have-beens and should-still-beez that make this cold heart turn warm.
5:33 AM is a good time to be tired of being a critic.
1.28.2004
Take Me Out
Bizarre story about a Cleveland Indians farmhand still embarassed by a college stunt involving gay porn here. Who knows if he's telling the truth but hats off to the regrettably named Indians for being classy about it.
Informer
Chances are good that if you're here, you've been here at some point and read about the static surrounding Peter Landesman's very depressing story on sex trafficking.
To add to the dogpile: A good chunk of Jack Shafer's criticism indicts anti-slavery activist Kevin Bales' fudgy stat work. The attack makes sense, even if you're put off by the fact that Shafer seems a little jumpy to defend the integrity of counting. Bales is the author of Disposable People and an all-around fascinating character. His only problem has been this: dropping the word "slavery" in the United States is the easiest way to get someone's attention, and then lose it very quickly. His treatment of chattel slavery in America is one of his book's only blind spots and it's amplified by the huge discursive shadow the word casts in these herre parts. In a way, this inadequacy of language muddies everyone involved--Landesman ends up splitting hairs, Bales has to weigh then-and-now oppressions and neutral-ish critics like Shafer remain neutral-ish. Rather than pursuing the infinite forms of exploitation condoned by our lifestyles, people end up wondering, "Is the New Slavery the same as the old one?" and "How can they be 'slaves' if they're technically getting paid?" and "I don't see any shackles." In a sense, Shafer could be right -- using current qualifiers, there aren't that many slaves out there. But he (and we and they) would be far better served if he applied his sleuth skills to what it was we were trying to count in the first place.
Vzzzzzzzzt. Change clothes and go in a different direction: does anyone have an MP3 of the Nonce's "Picnic Song?"
To add to the dogpile: A good chunk of Jack Shafer's criticism indicts anti-slavery activist Kevin Bales' fudgy stat work. The attack makes sense, even if you're put off by the fact that Shafer seems a little jumpy to defend the integrity of counting. Bales is the author of Disposable People and an all-around fascinating character. His only problem has been this: dropping the word "slavery" in the United States is the easiest way to get someone's attention, and then lose it very quickly. His treatment of chattel slavery in America is one of his book's only blind spots and it's amplified by the huge discursive shadow the word casts in these herre parts. In a way, this inadequacy of language muddies everyone involved--Landesman ends up splitting hairs, Bales has to weigh then-and-now oppressions and neutral-ish critics like Shafer remain neutral-ish. Rather than pursuing the infinite forms of exploitation condoned by our lifestyles, people end up wondering, "Is the New Slavery the same as the old one?" and "How can they be 'slaves' if they're technically getting paid?" and "I don't see any shackles." In a sense, Shafer could be right -- using current qualifiers, there aren't that many slaves out there. But he (and we and they) would be far better served if he applied his sleuth skills to what it was we were trying to count in the first place.
Vzzzzzzzzt. Change clothes and go in a different direction: does anyone have an MP3 of the Nonce's "Picnic Song?"
1.27.2004
"We're gaining Joe-mentum in Connecticut!"
I think it was Cosmo Vitelli who said that only those who are comfortable are truly happy. If so, then I am one happy guy. Having spend the past two days reorganizing my house, finishing the dreaded Wire column and reorganizing my CDs alphabetically by publicist, I proclaim myself far more comfortable than last week. Incidentally, old Wire stuff here.
Epiphanies from the in-progress column: 2Mex sounds exactly like someone who grew up at Project Blowed, grew up on the Cure and grew up wishing he could be Fernando Valenzuela. His new album, featuring a nice cover bite of Shepard's OBEY image, is fantastically inspiring and depressing. Mighty Casey has a new song called "Black Rapping School," and you know hip-hop is at a weird juncture when someone feels the need to qualify rapping as "black." (Speaking of the Cure, Casey samples "Love Cats" on the B-side "Liquorland II"; click his name to hear it.) The Professor has a comp out soon called 'Convexed' and it features "Black and White," a make-believe one-on-one between Timboking (Wu-affiliate) and R.A. the Rugged Man (white affiliate). it's cute.
Epiphanies from the in-progress column: 2Mex sounds exactly like someone who grew up at Project Blowed, grew up on the Cure and grew up wishing he could be Fernando Valenzuela. His new album, featuring a nice cover bite of Shepard's OBEY image, is fantastically inspiring and depressing. Mighty Casey has a new song called "Black Rapping School," and you know hip-hop is at a weird juncture when someone feels the need to qualify rapping as "black." (Speaking of the Cure, Casey samples "Love Cats" on the B-side "Liquorland II"; click his name to hear it.) The Professor has a comp out soon called 'Convexed' and it features "Black and White," a make-believe one-on-one between Timboking (Wu-affiliate) and R.A. the Rugged Man (white affiliate). it's cute.
1.26.2004
Don't Stop the Pontiff Rock
The world's most hardcore Rocksteady fan could meet the world's most knowledgeable Photoshop expert, and they still wouldn't have come up with this picture of a Polish breakdancer entertaining the Pope.
1.24.2004
Just Bleezy!
Check Jay Smooth's excellent interview with the producer Just Blaze. JB reminisces about Boot Camp Clik, fesses to being a bit of an Internet guy and kills the noise around whether/not he bit Evil Dee for the "P.S.A." beat. In case you were wondering. In case you're wondering too hard, you'll need RealPlayer.
I pined in vain for a Just Blaze discography online and found this do-it-yourself discographer, which is great.
Also, with his recent Grey Album victory, will Danger Mouse and Jemini's Ghetto Pop Life (Lex, 2003) be this year's most re-listened to record?
I pined in vain for a Just Blaze discography online and found this do-it-yourself discographer, which is great.
Also, with his recent Grey Album victory, will Danger Mouse and Jemini's Ghetto Pop Life (Lex, 2003) be this year's most re-listened to record?
More Mr. Nice Guy!
It is 5:41 A.M., I have finally finished filing my CDs and, four months into my lease, I am officially "moved into" my new apartment. Carrying this Hua-size CD shelf a mile through painfully frigid weather was a character-building experience to be sure, but it was all worth it just to see Andre Nickatina, Nico, No Doubt, No Neck Blues Band, Nobody, N.O.R.E. and Ogurusu Norihide mingling in a row, like God intended.
I finally understand why filesharing is a terrible, terrible thing. I've been rocking my bootleg copy of Kanye West's 'College Dropout' for a couple weeks and I thought I'd attained some level of I-understand-how-I-feel-about-this-ness. Today, I got the final, mastered advance (complete with creepy anti-pirate whispers) and it floored me. The tracks I'd heard--the same ones that have been reviewed all up and down the web--seemed fine, but apparently the completed version features a few extra songs, beefier choruses and hooks, fleshier handclaps, rewritten verses and running skits that help drive the whole College Dropout thing home. More on this later but I guess it comes down to this: there are Kanye reviews by the armload out on that thar web, but what these loyal nerds (I got nothin but love) have reviewed are unmastered demos. Maybe, in some strange way, leaking shit early gives artists a chance to figure out what'll be heat and what'll be wack--Kanye, after all, has leaked half his album on his mixtapes. But I can't help but feel that the download-with-the-intent-to-buy shield that some foist against Lars Ullrich is foiled when said swappers form opinions on shit that isn't finished. It would be like if
I finally understand why filesharing is a terrible, terrible thing. I've been rocking my bootleg copy of Kanye West's 'College Dropout' for a couple weeks and I thought I'd attained some level of I-understand-how-I-feel-about-this-ness. Today, I got the final, mastered advance (complete with creepy anti-pirate whispers) and it floored me. The tracks I'd heard--the same ones that have been reviewed all up and down the web--seemed fine, but apparently the completed version features a few extra songs, beefier choruses and hooks, fleshier handclaps, rewritten verses and running skits that help drive the whole College Dropout thing home. More on this later but I guess it comes down to this: there are Kanye reviews by the armload out on that thar web, but what these loyal nerds (I got nothin but love) have reviewed are unmastered demos. Maybe, in some strange way, leaking shit early gives artists a chance to figure out what'll be heat and what'll be wack--Kanye, after all, has leaked half his album on his mixtapes. But I can't help but feel that the download-with-the-intent-to-buy shield that some foist against Lars Ullrich is foiled when said swappers form opinions on shit that isn't finished. It would be like if
1.23.2004
"I See You There"
Moral quandary: If the point of DJing is moving the crowd, when is it appropriate to prevent people from dancing? Could it possibly be when it's nearing 2 A.M. (we Cantabridgians need our rest) and I'm looking at the front door? In the word of Marv Albert, Yesssss! And let's face it, if you haven't been dancing to my shit all night, I'm not about to let you oblige me now just because you're drunk. Hypothetically, of course.
Caveat: When the people appreciate Lord Finesse's "Bad Mutha," some but not all of the above becomes okay.
Random Claim: Am working on a review of Ellay Khule/Rifleman of the Chillin' Villain Empire/HipHopKclan/Project Blowed/Afterlife. Ellay is tastefully, impossibly fast. You know how Twista double-times his rhymes, only he's not really saying anything of substance so he's just double-timing nothing? 'Cool, he just said "KeithSweat" twice as fast as I would have.' Ellay's not like that. Just take my word for it. And search out the 'Skillenium' 7-inch, wherein our hero infinity-times it over a drowsified bit from 'Planet Rock.' Here is something Dave Tompkins wrote on Ellay that is occasionally intelligible and always inspired.
Happy New Year. It should be a doozy.
Caveat: When the people appreciate Lord Finesse's "Bad Mutha," some but not all of the above becomes okay.
Random Claim: Am working on a review of Ellay Khule/Rifleman of the Chillin' Villain Empire/HipHopKclan/Project Blowed/Afterlife. Ellay is tastefully, impossibly fast. You know how Twista double-times his rhymes, only he's not really saying anything of substance so he's just double-timing nothing? 'Cool, he just said "KeithSweat" twice as fast as I would have.' Ellay's not like that. Just take my word for it. And search out the 'Skillenium' 7-inch, wherein our hero infinity-times it over a drowsified bit from 'Planet Rock.' Here is something Dave Tompkins wrote on Ellay that is occasionally intelligible and always inspired.
Happy New Year. It should be a doozy.
1.21.2004
Learn Chinese
I did a story on the 80-20 Initiative for the Village Voice last year that will hopefully appear this year, but the gist of their organization is this: congeal the Asian American voting population into a committed block and then auction it to whichever Prez candidate promises to back Asian-American interests. Luckily (Asian Americans can constitute a pretty significant swing vote, after all) this has usually meant alliance with the Dems. It has also meant beef with Shaquille O'Neal. 80-20 is the brainchild of S.B. Woo, one-time Congressional candidate from Delaware and a very well-intentioned, old-fashioned and hyper-efficient (as you will see below) guy who loves using ALL-CAPS in his emails, AS YOU WILL ALSO SEE BELOW.
I'll save my thoughts on 80-20 and ethnic block voting for a later date, but here's 80-20's latest "triumph," fresh from www.80-20initiative.net:
"Yesterday, Turner Broadcaster Steve Kerr described Ming Yao as a "7'6" Chinaman," during the Houston versus Memphis game. 80-20 induced a sincere apology within 3 hours.
(1) At 3:00 p.m. today, 80-20 obtained concrete evidence that Steve Kerr, a TNT broadcaster, described Ming Yao as a "7'6" Chinaman."
At 4:15 p.m., 80-20- staff Jing-Li Yu left words with the secretary of TNT CEO, Philip I. Kent, that 80-20 President S. B. Woo wanted to be called regarding the incident.
At 5:45 p.m., TNT Senior VP Jeff Banky and Broadcaster Steve Kerr called S. B. at his home and apologized profusely. They asked him to in turn convey their apologies to the Asian American community. It seemed obvious that Kerr didn't know that Chinaman, unlike Frenchman and Englishman, was a derogatory term. S.B. accepted the apology with the condition that Mr. Kerr also called Ming Yao to apologize. S.B. also requested that Mr. Kerr to publicize, whenever appropriate, the impropriety of using derogatory terms in describing minorities. Mr. Kerr agreed. 80-20 TURNED A NEGATIVE CASE INTO A POSITIVE ONE IN 2 HOURS AND 45 MINUTES."
I'll save my thoughts on 80-20 and ethnic block voting for a later date, but here's 80-20's latest "triumph," fresh from www.80-20initiative.net:
"Yesterday, Turner Broadcaster Steve Kerr described Ming Yao as a "7'6" Chinaman," during the Houston versus Memphis game. 80-20 induced a sincere apology within 3 hours.
(1) At 3:00 p.m. today, 80-20 obtained concrete evidence that Steve Kerr, a TNT broadcaster, described Ming Yao as a "7'6" Chinaman."
At 4:15 p.m., 80-20- staff Jing-Li Yu left words with the secretary of TNT CEO, Philip I. Kent, that 80-20 President S. B. Woo wanted to be called regarding the incident.
At 5:45 p.m., TNT Senior VP Jeff Banky and Broadcaster Steve Kerr called S. B. at his home and apologized profusely. They asked him to in turn convey their apologies to the Asian American community. It seemed obvious that Kerr didn't know that Chinaman, unlike Frenchman and Englishman, was a derogatory term. S.B. accepted the apology with the condition that Mr. Kerr also called Ming Yao to apologize. S.B. also requested that Mr. Kerr to publicize, whenever appropriate, the impropriety of using derogatory terms in describing minorities. Mr. Kerr agreed. 80-20 TURNED A NEGATIVE CASE INTO A POSITIVE ONE IN 2 HOURS AND 45 MINUTES."
1.20.2004
Looks like America's A-OK!
You’ve just captured Saddam Hussein, the Democrats are shook, your popularity is so firm you could probably show up with coke trailing down your chin and you’d still beat Optimus Prime running away and you have 5000 words to connect with Joe (or Jose) Yeoman American. Did Bush really need to talk about steroids in sports? I half-expected him to weigh in on the Pete Rose thing near the end there. Osama? Qui est Osama bin Laden?
Great Moments in Teleology: “America is a nation with a mission and that mission comes from our most basic beliefs. We have no desire to dominate, no ambitions of empire. Our aim is a democratic peace—a peace founded upon the dignity and rights of every man and woman. America acts in this cause with friends and allies at our side, yet we understand our special calling: This great republic will lead the cause of freedom.”
(I love statements like this like a fat kid loves cake—talk about destiny! I love true callings! Did John Winthrop really know what he was getting the world into when he said that “City on a Hill” thing? Wacky sidenote: Practically every nation in the world has considered itself The City on The Hill. But I guess they were all wrong.)
How gangsta was it when Bush tricked the Dems into clapping against tax cuts, then swiftly outlined how badly they would potentially screw The Middle Class Yeoman? The guy is evil, sure—and how long has it been since we heard so divisive a State of the Union—but that was a smart way to make the Dems look like the Commie scum my uncle believes them to be. How about some hardcore, Democrats?
“When the gates of prison open, the path should lead to a better life…”
This was one of those moments when you hear cheers and agree with them, and then step back and think, “Wait—would anyone not want that?” (It’s pretty amusing how politicians pat themselves on the back as “pro-environment” or “pro-growth”—when was the last time you heard someone say, “Thanks but I’m actually against the environment.”) The punchline for Bush’s push for faith-based help is this attempt to assimilate inmates back into mainstream society; I believe the scene he described was one of “unleashing the compassion of America’s religious institutions.” In theory, I’m all for this (the attempts to stem recidivism, not that creepy “unleashing” part)—as far as I’m concerned, few politicians of any stripe have said or done anything sensible about America’s prisons. Now if only they could vote! (Unless, of course, that’s the next piece of this puzzle!)
Hottest line in a Democratic response with the charm of an Infomercial: “America must be a light to the world, not just a missile.”
Just remember: “America will never seek a permission slip to defend the security of our country."
Great Moments in Teleology: “America is a nation with a mission and that mission comes from our most basic beliefs. We have no desire to dominate, no ambitions of empire. Our aim is a democratic peace—a peace founded upon the dignity and rights of every man and woman. America acts in this cause with friends and allies at our side, yet we understand our special calling: This great republic will lead the cause of freedom.”
(I love statements like this like a fat kid loves cake—talk about destiny! I love true callings! Did John Winthrop really know what he was getting the world into when he said that “City on a Hill” thing? Wacky sidenote: Practically every nation in the world has considered itself The City on The Hill. But I guess they were all wrong.)
How gangsta was it when Bush tricked the Dems into clapping against tax cuts, then swiftly outlined how badly they would potentially screw The Middle Class Yeoman? The guy is evil, sure—and how long has it been since we heard so divisive a State of the Union—but that was a smart way to make the Dems look like the Commie scum my uncle believes them to be. How about some hardcore, Democrats?
“When the gates of prison open, the path should lead to a better life…”
This was one of those moments when you hear cheers and agree with them, and then step back and think, “Wait—would anyone not want that?” (It’s pretty amusing how politicians pat themselves on the back as “pro-environment” or “pro-growth”—when was the last time you heard someone say, “Thanks but I’m actually against the environment.”) The punchline for Bush’s push for faith-based help is this attempt to assimilate inmates back into mainstream society; I believe the scene he described was one of “unleashing the compassion of America’s religious institutions.” In theory, I’m all for this (the attempts to stem recidivism, not that creepy “unleashing” part)—as far as I’m concerned, few politicians of any stripe have said or done anything sensible about America’s prisons. Now if only they could vote! (Unless, of course, that’s the next piece of this puzzle!)
Hottest line in a Democratic response with the charm of an Infomercial: “America must be a light to the world, not just a missile.”
Just remember: “America will never seek a permission slip to defend the security of our country."
By the Time Arizona Gets to the 12th Century
1/ Let's face it, liberal-ish Northeasterner John Kerry will be a hard sell, and who knows what will happen from Iowa on. But doesn't he have The Presidential Face?
1a/ Who would win in a four-way race between Hal Philip Walker (the faceless, pretty radical candidate from Nashville), Beatty's Bulworth, Redford in The Candidate and Bob Roberts?
2/ Why is the NBA so boring? Could Rasheed have been right? Is the league too concerned with flashy newness and not players who've proven they can win? Is Billy Beane right about this whole 'empiricism' thing? And how unwatchable were the Knicks before netting Starbury?
2a/ Overheard at today's Knicks-Raptors game while in line at the concession stand: "Why are they singing (the Canadian National Anthem)?" "It's the Canadian anthem. The NBA is all over the place." "They play other countries? Like againt France?" "No, they haven't gone there yet." "How about Mexico? That's a state, right?" "Yeah Mexico is a state, but they don't have a team yet either."
2b/ The best part about the NBA? Fodder for Chris Ryan's blog.
3/ Kanye West's inability to rock the sing-song is reaching Mark E. Smith-ian proportions. But College Dropout is already probably the funniest rap record of 2004. Current favorite, from the song "Drug Dealin'": "You know the kids gon act a fool/When you stop the programs for after school/And they BCFs, some of 'em dyslexic/They favorite 50 Cent song's '12 Questions.'"
4/ Is this how uncool Madonna is now? Wesley Clark limped out of Iowa with 0.1% of the vote? Is the endorsement of the most sincerely superficial, artificially genuine pop icon of our time worth nothing?
5/ Something that's worth something: The Spook Who Sat By the Door is finally available on DVD!
1a/ Who would win in a four-way race between Hal Philip Walker (the faceless, pretty radical candidate from Nashville), Beatty's Bulworth, Redford in The Candidate and Bob Roberts?
2/ Why is the NBA so boring? Could Rasheed have been right? Is the league too concerned with flashy newness and not players who've proven they can win? Is Billy Beane right about this whole 'empiricism' thing? And how unwatchable were the Knicks before netting Starbury?
2a/ Overheard at today's Knicks-Raptors game while in line at the concession stand: "Why are they singing (the Canadian National Anthem)?" "It's the Canadian anthem. The NBA is all over the place." "They play other countries? Like againt France?" "No, they haven't gone there yet." "How about Mexico? That's a state, right?" "Yeah Mexico is a state, but they don't have a team yet either."
2b/ The best part about the NBA? Fodder for Chris Ryan's blog.
3/ Kanye West's inability to rock the sing-song is reaching Mark E. Smith-ian proportions. But College Dropout is already probably the funniest rap record of 2004. Current favorite, from the song "Drug Dealin'": "You know the kids gon act a fool/When you stop the programs for after school/And they BCFs, some of 'em dyslexic/They favorite 50 Cent song's '12 Questions.'"
4/ Is this how uncool Madonna is now? Wesley Clark limped out of Iowa with 0.1% of the vote? Is the endorsement of the most sincerely superficial, artificially genuine pop icon of our time worth nothing?
5/ Something that's worth something: The Spook Who Sat By the Door is finally available on DVD!
1.18.2004
Ugly People Be Quiet
"P.S.K." always makes any room feel small. The bottom! The hi-hats! The suspense! Sometimes you go to hear a legendary DJ not because you want to hear their rarest pieces but because they make you hear the stuff you already have in totally new ways. When Cash Money dropped this last night at APT., it floored the 17% of the people there who actually cared. And when he followed that thicket up with "Kick the Ball?" Ha-jeezus.
1.17.2004
"Don't Stop Til You Get to Figueroa"
I don't know what's weirder, the fact that Michael Jackson invited everyone to his house for a post-arraignment party or the fact that invitations to that party are already available for purchase.
Whoppers in bowl form? Dr. Atkins [R.I.P.] is on fire! Oddly enough, last year we taught an edition of Upton Sinclair's The Jungle with an afterword penned by Atkins. In it, he related Sinclair's wrenching descriptions of pre-F.D.A. meat handling and manufacturing practices to the merits of no-carb, high-protein diets. Atkins, like many modern-day readers who fix on the meaty parts, missed Sinclair's original intention. He didn't really care about the food. Rather, Sinclair hoped his book and its descriptions of the sad conditions of the working class would inspire readers to take up arms against capitalism.
Whoppers in bowl form? Dr. Atkins [R.I.P.] is on fire! Oddly enough, last year we taught an edition of Upton Sinclair's The Jungle with an afterword penned by Atkins. In it, he related Sinclair's wrenching descriptions of pre-F.D.A. meat handling and manufacturing practices to the merits of no-carb, high-protein diets. Atkins, like many modern-day readers who fix on the meaty parts, missed Sinclair's original intention. He didn't really care about the food. Rather, Sinclair hoped his book and its descriptions of the sad conditions of the working class would inspire readers to take up arms against capitalism.
1.16.2004
While My Thermostat Gently Weeps
Just got back to Cambridge, MA - damn it's cold. One thing that warms me over: the human imagination! Two fantastic expressions of human imagination, courtesy today's mail: DJ Danger Mouse's 'Grey Album' and the P Brothers' 'Zulu Beats.' the Former, described below, is a lot better than I could have ever imagined. In a world of seemingly limitless samples, I've always wanted someone to do like DM and administer these fake restraints. Using only Beatles samples seems like a pointless exercise but a lot of it ends up bettering the original. The Latter is the record obsessive/producer Ivory's attempt to recreate an old Afrika Islam radio show from the comfort of his home in Nottingham, England.
1.14.2004
Confessions of a Dangerous Mind Chasing Liberty
Terrell Owens works out his Siegfried and Roy-isms on the cover of his latest calendar. Not quite as weird as the personal photographs section on Ricky Williams' site (complete with webjournal). Trevor Pryce is probably the coolest linebacker in the game who hasn't (a) been accused of stabbing someone or (b) shot in the ass. (Don't laugh - one of the NFL's hundreds of gun-toting football players might hear you and get mad.) Pryce earns this distinction by sidestepping convention and big-upping UNKLE/Shadow.
A bunch of movie theaters in the Bay Area have this configuration on their marquees: 'Monster' on the first line, 'In America' on the second.
A bunch of movie theaters in the Bay Area have this configuration on their marquees: 'Monster' on the first line, 'In America' on the second.
Mars Attacks Jurassic Park
Terrell Owens works out his Siegfriend and Roy-isms on the cover of his new calendar. Either way, it's not as weird as the photo section of Ricky Williams' website. Also check his journal, which is a lot more meticulous than one would figure. Lastly, Trevor Pryce proves that he's probably the coolest linebacker who hasn't /a/ been accused of stabbing someone or /b/ been shot in the ass. Don't laugh -- one of the hundreds of gun-toting NFLers might be in earshot. Pryce earns this distinction by sidestepping usual musical fare and big-upping UNKLE/Shadow.
I've seen a couple theaters in the Bay Area with this marquee arrangement: "MONSTER" on the first line, "IN AMERICA" on the second. Blame it on Paul O'Neill!
I've seen a couple theaters in the Bay Area with this marquee arrangement: "MONSTER" on the first line, "IN AMERICA" on the second. Blame it on Paul O'Neill!
"why don't we mash-up in the road?"
this really perks the grad student in me: DJ Danger Mouse has just completed The Grey Album. you've heard (of) the Kev Brown Brown Album and Kardinal Offishall's Black Jays (get it? he's from toronto, home of the blue jays!). maybe you copped DJ Lt. Dan's Black Album Remixes, wherein he retrofits jay's prequel-ish verses with pre-reasonable doubt beats. and you probably avoided KNO of the Cunninlynguist's white album (so named because I'm assuming KNO is of the lighter hue?). what, you might ask, is the grey album? jay's verses + beats made exclusively from the beatles' white album. what will they think of next? this could be terrible, but then again danger mouse's last few mash-up gambles (suzanne vega + 50 cent = fun!) were at least interesting. and would you really prefer to hear Just Blaze re-rigging the Ugly Duckling album?
1.12.2004
"My Art is Like Wo(jo)!"
I hope Grant Hill returns to the NBA someday but if he doesn't he can always fall back on his art collecting.
oh, he retired from the AL
the only thing that makes roger clemens' latest defection okay is fantasizing about how maddening all this must be for george steinbrenner. first pettitte, then wells and now clemens. between clemens and jeff kent, the astros are now the surliest team in baseball. what? white baseball players aren't surly? oh yeah, they're the ones with the 'linebacker mentalities' who 'bring the lunchpails to work.'
random thoughts relating to something I'm working on: if you think about it, 2003 was a pretty remarkable year for hip-hop-as-spectacle. aboveground: puffy (who has been known to compare himself to gatsby - someone tell farnsworth to finish reading the book to him) ran the city, jay-z 'retired,' russell bumrushed the rockefeller back-and-forth, Reebok gave us 'S.Carters' and 'G-Units,' the democratic candidates namechecked outkast and concocted campaign raps, 'black music' swept the pop top-ten for the first time ever and 'bling' made it into the OED.
we didn't need 2003 to tell us what fat joe told us years ago: shit iz real. but I don't think I'm being hyperbolic when I say that 2003 catches us at a fascinating crossroads. hip-hop is big and global--duh. it seems like a lot of folks on the inside are finally starting to wonder what to do with the great responsibility that comes with that big-ness, that global-ness. if you're russell or puff, you play tangents and give politics a go. if you're jay-z or 50 or eminem, you keep adding to your pyramid schemes and wonder aloud about the ethics of what you're doing--thus a whole generation of 'conflicted' and misunderstood rappers having their cake and eating it too, but also pretending they feel bad about it. all this (the arc as well as my thoughts on it) is incomplete, but it's something I find exciting nonetheless.
random thoughts relating to something I'm working on: if you think about it, 2003 was a pretty remarkable year for hip-hop-as-spectacle. aboveground: puffy (who has been known to compare himself to gatsby - someone tell farnsworth to finish reading the book to him) ran the city, jay-z 'retired,' russell bumrushed the rockefeller back-and-forth, Reebok gave us 'S.Carters' and 'G-Units,' the democratic candidates namechecked outkast and concocted campaign raps, 'black music' swept the pop top-ten for the first time ever and 'bling' made it into the OED.
we didn't need 2003 to tell us what fat joe told us years ago: shit iz real. but I don't think I'm being hyperbolic when I say that 2003 catches us at a fascinating crossroads. hip-hop is big and global--duh. it seems like a lot of folks on the inside are finally starting to wonder what to do with the great responsibility that comes with that big-ness, that global-ness. if you're russell or puff, you play tangents and give politics a go. if you're jay-z or 50 or eminem, you keep adding to your pyramid schemes and wonder aloud about the ethics of what you're doing--thus a whole generation of 'conflicted' and misunderstood rappers having their cake and eating it too, but also pretending they feel bad about it. all this (the arc as well as my thoughts on it) is incomplete, but it's something I find exciting nonetheless.
1.11.2004
where have you gone, vlad guerrero? and why?
my favorite call in football is 'illegal touching.' juvenile, but it hits me like when they call a player on the ol' 'giving him the business' penalty in the madden video games. for the record, 'illegal touching' occurs when a player goes out of bounds, comes back in and is the first player to touch the ball. my least favorite commercial is the one where the dudes play basketball while flailing around on rollerblades.
sometimes you just have to have faith in the why: I 'overheard' (or whatever you would call the sideline view of a listserve discussion) a pretty good conversation about dizzee rascal last week. the aff. pointed out that d.r. and the 'grime' scene have totally mutilated and denatured a 2-step/garage scene previously known for its bounce and sheen and made it un-danceable; the neg. asked why this was a good thing, and I bought that...it was the ol' 'why prop up art for smart's sake?' defense. my jury is still out to lunch on dizzee, but the whole thing calls to mind another micro-micro-genre I've recently come around on...I initially thought 'micro-house' was a similarly useless exercise, i.e. - why submerge house's bigness in little, rippled drips and snowpack? isn't there something better you can go intellectualize? but, thanks to the benevolence of forced exposure, I have seen the light. just a thought. another thought: why don't police officers wear sweatpants and running shoes? wouldn't that make pursuit easier on their knees?
sometimes you just have to have faith in the why: I 'overheard' (or whatever you would call the sideline view of a listserve discussion) a pretty good conversation about dizzee rascal last week. the aff. pointed out that d.r. and the 'grime' scene have totally mutilated and denatured a 2-step/garage scene previously known for its bounce and sheen and made it un-danceable; the neg. asked why this was a good thing, and I bought that...it was the ol' 'why prop up art for smart's sake?' defense. my jury is still out to lunch on dizzee, but the whole thing calls to mind another micro-micro-genre I've recently come around on...I initially thought 'micro-house' was a similarly useless exercise, i.e. - why submerge house's bigness in little, rippled drips and snowpack? isn't there something better you can go intellectualize? but, thanks to the benevolence of forced exposure, I have seen the light. just a thought. another thought: why don't police officers wear sweatpants and running shoes? wouldn't that make pursuit easier on their knees?
1.10.2004
dismember the titans
as much as I respect steve mcnair and eddie george (who, incidentally, has the smoothest face in professional sports) I'm relieved the Pats came out on top today. (in the three+ years I've spent in boston studying the study of American history, tom brady is the only individual who has made me wish I was still ten in that preternatural time when I believed in heroes. pedro martinez inspires similar feelings, but in more of a krs-one way.) how great was it to see mike martz's "offensive genius" spoiled yet again by hubris? very great.
good recent ncaa football names that came to mind while watching the game: jamal lord and frostee rucker
good recent ncaa football names that came to mind while watching the game: jamal lord and frostee rucker
It is 4:48 A.M. and I have finally figured out how the internet works. Welcome!
